WHAT'S UP 2014.
Okay I'm almost 3 months late. Well with all the new micro blogging platforms app, blogging on a laptop seems so 2000 and late. Hahaha I kid. I still love blogging when you are typing on an actual keyboard.
So I must say 2014 has been treating me fairly well (cept for the going to be working soon part). Impromptu trip to HK with Celine where we spent almost 10k sgd in 5 days, climb hills and mountains to find Joyrich, fruitful trip at Chrome Hearts, battling the HK crowd (no joke) and having lots of yummy food *__* Then it was CNY, most boring ever I don't even wanna talk about it. Then I suddenly went into hibernation where I stopped going out and talked to anyone for erm Idk, weeks? I kinda love my hibernation mode actually. It's really rejuvenating for me.
After almost 3 months of doing nothing, I finally felt bored. I never thought I will say this but yes, I was feeling so bored that I think I might go crazy. Part of me kinda can't wait for work to start but another part of me knows that I will definitely regret. So for the work part. What have I been doing? Well, I've attended 2 meetings and 3 dinners, not cool. I just don't feel comfortable in situations like this and I hate that I'm uncomfortable. I wanna be able to hold conversations and socialize. That brings me to the dinner I had today. All I can say that it's a total disaster. Honestly, I wasn't prepared. I rehearsed in my head all the situations that may have happened but still I did not perform up to my standards. Is it normal to regret doing certain things and not doing certain things at such events? Everytime after I attend a dinner, I can't stop thinking about the things I said and the things I should have said. Sigh it matters a lot to me :( I don't want people to think I'm a bimbo, I don't want them to think I don't know anything. I have so much to prove that I feel that sometimes I'm over-stressing myself. It's not healthy isn't it? Setting such high standards for myself. I never liked putting myself in situations I'm not comfortable it. I absolutely detest it. But it seems like it's unavoidable now. My sister ask me how can I stand it? Fact is, I can't stand it. But I just throw myself into such situations. Don't think, just go. Why? I know I will think of how to survive once I'm in the situation. No matter how much I hate it, I'm already in the situation so there's nothing else I can do but to adapt. I'm not sure if this is the right way but I guess it's kinda working for me.
My birthday is coming up and for the first time (or maybe not the first time), I'm not excited anymore. One thing to be happy about is that... I'm not that bothered about my age anymore!! Hurrays hahaha. I hope by the end of the year, I will be able to say turning 23 is one of the best things that happened in my life. And I also hope I will be able to have some achievements that my family and friends will be proud of. Hi Working Life, I'm all ready for you!
Oh and I just got myself some off-days in May. Boss says yes so yays I should be travelling in May *^^* Perks of working for your dad ;)
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